5 Reasons Why You Don’t Get Along With Other Women

Estava Morioka January 5, 2011 46
5 Reasons Why You Don’t Get Along With Other Women

I hear a lot of women say “I don’t really have a lot of friends” or “I don’t get along well with other women”…and when I hear women say this, my first thought is “Why not??? What the heck is wrong with you???”.  Call me crazy but this doesn’t make too much sense to me.  It actually makes me a little sad. Sad because, none of us are perfect but when people miss the calling on their own faults and fail to recognize them, then that’s sad.  If 50% of the population doesn’t like you, then there must be something wrong with YOU!  Fortunate for you I have tons of friends, both male and female and here is is my story and advice to all of the women repellent women out there…

The Party With The Crazy Chick

One of my close friends had a social gathering at her house a few weeks ago.  About 30 people showed up and we had a good time.  Good food, good music, good company.  I was one of the first to get there since I talked her into hosting the event.  I felt obligated to be on time, otherwise I would have just showed up 2 hours late like I normally do.  People started pouring in at about an hour after start time.  One person was this girl Shayna.  When she came in I greeted her with a warm hand shake and a smile although I had never met her before. I immediately noticed that my friendly greeting was met with a cold fake half smile and a fingertip hand shake (you know the one where the person really doesn’t want to touch you so they only give you their finger tips).  My thoughts marinated on it for all of 2.45 seconds and on to the next person.  The night settled in and everybody mixed an mingled. The whole house was open for the party so people dispersed into 3 rooms or so.  I noticed all night long that Shayna kept stomping back and forth from one room to another. Each time she left a room I could see her do the black girl neck wiggling while mumbling profanities under her breath as if someone had pissed her off and she couldn’t stand to be in the room with them anymore.  But then about 20 minutes later, she would go back into the room for more torture.  This was the same behavior for each room.  She just stormed around the house all night. It was very bizarre!

It Came to Me Like A Song I Wrote

I then realized that I had met her before.  A couple of years ago I met her at a brunch.  I remember having a conversation with her about her extreme misfortunes of dating in LA (I mean her stories were crazy!  I know some good people who have had bad dating luck but all her stories ended with her getting into a shouting match with some man…kinda freaked me out). And we also talked about how surprised she was that we were having such great conversation because she doesn’t normally “get along well” with women.  I remember thinking…”You have had really bad experiences dating men and you don’t get along well with women?  Men don’t like you and women don’t like you?  Who do you get along with?  There is a problem here and the common denominator here is YOU!”

It’s Just Plain Funny Now

So as she stormed around the house, wiggling her neck in disdain looking like a bobble head doll, I couldn’t help but to find comedic relief in the situation.  At this point it was just down right funny to me.  I pointed her behavior out to a good friend and we were just entertained for the rest of the night.  As the night wined down, and the remaining stragglers recapped the night over the last few ounces of alcohol, one hot topic was Shayna and how negative she was.  I knew what the deal was with her so I stayed out of her conversations but the consensus was that she was very negative.  One of the guys even said that she called him “Satan”…  What????? who calls another person “Satan” when they first meet? Well, excuse me, apparently Satan’s daughter herself, Shayna does.

After having brunch with her and “enjoying” her at a party, it was clear to me why she doesn’t get along with other women.  So here is my advice to Shayna and all women repellent women on how to get along with other women

5 Ways To Make Female Friends

1. Be Nice, Smile, Be Positive.

Women are emotional creatures.  We can pick up on vibes and energy.  When you meet a woman, if you are having negative thoughts at the time, we will pick up on it.  It doesn’t matter if those thoughts are about how you don’t like what we are wearing or if you are thinking about how you want to strangle your boss on Monday morn.  It doesn’t matter we will pick up on it. Smiles go a long way.  Sometimes women are so accustomed to assumed mental competition when we are in the same room as another woman, that we immediately assume that other women are threatened by us or vice versa.  Be secure in yourself and stop mental competitions with other women. Smile and be non-threatening.

2. Don’t Look Lustfully at Another Woman’s Man

This one seems to go without saying but I feel that I do need to say it. If you are giving another woman’s man googly eyes, you will be hated.  It’s a lose/lose situation for you: either way, she’s gonna hate you, and if the man does in fact respond then he’s not a good guy.  Besides there are so many single men out here, why would you want to make googly eyes at one that’s already taken?

3. Give Compliments

If a woman is wearing something that you admire then why not tell her how good she looks in that amazing Estava Morioka Party dress?  She will appreciate it.  Most likely she will compliment you back, since you already know that you have similar taste then you’re probably wearing something that she likes too.

4. Stop with the Black Girl Neck Wiggling

I tried to be fair and find a pic of a white girl with an attitude but google says it doesnt exist

The black girl neck wiggle action…It’s not just for black girls anymore.  I have some very educated well rounded non-urban acting white girlfriends that do this and I hate it.  Its so threatening.  You could be having the best conversation with the nicest person in the world but as soon as they whip this one out, they send a message saying that they can flip a crazy switch at any moment.

5. Stop Hating!

“Hating” is just another word for “Being Jealous”.  You should never rule someone out as being your friend because you are jealous of them.  First of all, be honest with yourself.  Do you really not like that girl at work because she is too “arrogant and cocky”?  Or is it really because you are jealous of her confidence, her 4 karat diamond engagement ring, her brand new beautiful Gucci bag, or is it the way that her sexy cocktail dress that she got from EstavaMorioka.com hugged her every curve at the office Christmas party?  Really be honest with yourself.  You never know, if you are nice to her and you become friends, she just might set you up with her fiance’s hunkier richer cousin.  Or she might introduce you to her best friend that works at the Gucci store in South Coast Plaza so you can get that discount.  Or she might put you on the mailing list for EstavaMorioka.com so that you can be the first to find out about sales and discounts.  Or she might just be a really great person and friend. There are so many haters left in the world. Get with the movement. You’re getting old and its getting tired. Get some confidence already!

BTW, We just added a markdown tab in our online boutique.  Add yourself to our mailing list to find out about sales and markdowns before everyone else.

www.EstavaMorioka.com

The World Is Your Red Carpet

Get Our Stories Right In Your Mailbox

46 Comments »

  1. Samantha@teeth grinding January 6, 2011 at 2:05 am - Reply

    I like how you cited all of these reasons. Most women who have insecurities inside them have issues on doing or not doing any of these things. I hope they could actually change there attitude to have more girlfriends!
    Samantha@teeth grinding recently posted..Causes Of Teeth GrindingMy Profile

  2. Kissie January 9, 2011 at 12:10 pm - Reply

    I love this and you don’t have to worry about me because I cannot get the “wiggle” thing at all! (Loved your picture caption too – PERFECT)I guess Google lies, huh? ;-)

    I’m working on a post that would be a great complement to this — it talks about all of the good people who surround me but you can’t attract good when you’re a “Shayna” … most times positive people are allergic to the negative ones and vice versa. Could be the reason you got the fingertip shake. HILARIOUS, by the way.

    I find it sad that miserable people don’t know what they’re missing and that their behavior is the reason for them missing it. You have some good tips here, Little Lady. If your mom wasn’t my best friend (sister), I’d still love you! I’m glad you’re blogging again, I love to see your personality come through in your writing. You almost remind me of myself.

    Don’t hate! {That’s to the Shaynas out there.}
    Kissie recently posted..Just Not Your Average LOL GirlMy Profile

    • Estava Morioka January 21, 2011 at 12:48 pm - Reply

      I love this! Thanks Auntie! Im glad that I have a great mentor like you!

  3. LatestGirls January 9, 2011 at 10:27 pm - Reply

    My god it is absolutely true. That neck wriggling would obviously put me off if someone is doing that in front of me.
    LatestGirls recently posted..Different types of Jeans for WomenMy Profile

  4. Claire and Vasia January 10, 2011 at 11:46 am - Reply

    Awesome !!!! :D

    Claire & Vasia
    http://www.fashionhasit.com

    P.S: you can visit our blog and follow us if you wish :) Thank you.

  5. Smuze January 10, 2011 at 3:52 pm - Reply

    It’s natures work, you cannot fight it. I see it on my female dog, she doesn’t get along with other female dogs but like’s male dogs very much (and not in “that way”… :-) )
    Smuze recently posted..How to write an articleMy Profile

    • Estava Morioka January 21, 2011 at 12:46 pm - Reply

      Yes I see what you are saying, but human being are not dogs. we should be able to let reason overcome basic animal instincts.

  6. lisa January 24, 2011 at 12:39 pm - Reply

    I tend to become close friends with guys more easily than with girls most of the time. Many guys are refreshingly upfront with their anger or frustration, but they can also let things slide much easier, and I can be really blunt and honest, so a lot of the times it’s more about a good personality fit.
    lisa recently posted..Todays Outfit- Easy Work Ensemble 2My Profile

    • Estava Morioka January 24, 2011 at 1:38 pm - Reply

      Yes. I definitely agree with you. You should always keep company with people who complement your personality. But keep in mind that there are some women out there with personalities similar to yours, although they may be few and far between. I just don’t want you to overlook 50% of the human population as a resource for networking and great friendships.

  7. Tia January 24, 2011 at 8:47 pm - Reply

    We are so peculiar. I am a woman, and a leader, and I’m 30. At this point in my life I can say that I prefer the company of women unless it’s with a guy that I’m dating. Men drive me completely bonkers.

    And they stink. :)

    Maybe that’s just me.
    Tia recently posted..The 5 Healthiest Leafy Greens in the WorldMy Profile

    • Estava Morioka January 24, 2011 at 9:35 pm - Reply

      LOL…. You are too funny. I appreciate the honesty. Although, I dont really meet too many stinky men…pause, I just hung out with a not so pleasant smelling man a few months ago and needless to say I never hung out with him again. And really he wasnt stinky, i just think that I rejected his pheromones.

  8. Delena Silverfox@Coupon Codes February 3, 2011 at 6:34 pm - Reply

    The neck-wiggling thing! Oh, how I hate it! I worked at a doggie parlor once, and one of the girls there just had trailer filth coming out of her mouth all the time, got into fights on the phone, and wiggled her head like that all the time. No wonder no one ever hung out with her!

    Delena
    Delena Silverfox@Coupon Codes recently posted..iContact Coupon CodeMy Profile

  9. Gladys G. Perry February 16, 2011 at 6:58 pm - Reply

    I find that I interact better with men than women.Some women not all women are catty chatty dolls. This content of this hub is relevant to the topic and is not intended tobe judgmental offensive or to raise any red flags.This hub was written about my personal encounter and experiences that I have witness and other females have expressed the same view point when it comes to certain female behaviors towards other women.These behaviors start as early as grammar school when girls were girls. One of my girl friends will make sure that the guys will always look at her first when we are out at a club or concert.

  10. buy gold March 21, 2011 at 4:57 pm - Reply

    I find that I interact better with men than women.Some women not all women are catty chatty dolls. This content of this hub is relevant to the topic and is not intended tobe judgmental offensive or to raise any red flags.This hub was written about my personal encounter and experiences that I have witness and other females have expressed the same view point when it comes to certain female behaviors towards other women.These behaviors start as early as grammar school when girls were girls. One of my girl friends will make sure that the guys will always look at her first when we are out at a club or concert.

  11. Karate Santa Monica April 1, 2011 at 1:16 pm - Reply

    It’s so true! I feel like all women view life as a competition, and when it doesn’t go our way it’s someone else’s fault. I admit, I’ve had my moments, but never to THAT extreme. It takes a good, hard “Coming to Jesus” moment to realize how ridiculous you are being; and being one of “those” girls. As women, I think we are a bit more guarded, but this is the 21st century- so I agree- be positive and friendly! At the end of the day, if it doesn’t work out, at least you’ve tried.
    -Ava

  12. rosin April 6, 2011 at 4:30 am - Reply

    moment to realize how ridiculous you are being; and being one of “those” girls.

  13. No Name April 10, 2011 at 2:58 pm - Reply

    Wow. Something wrong with me, huh? I do all those things, like be nice, polite, etc… and women still hate me. I hope you are not an actual shrink, because probably patients would end up committing suicide with your advice.

    • Estava Morioka April 12, 2011 at 3:36 pm - Reply

      lol…I dont know weather to laugh or feel bad…
      thanks for the comment!

  14. buy gold April 18, 2011 at 10:44 pm - Reply

    I find that I interact better with men than women.Some women not all women are catty chatty dolls. This content of this hub is relevant to the topic and is not intended tobe judgmental offensive or to raise any red flags.This hub was written about my personal encounter and experiences that I have witness and other females have expressed the same view point when it comes to certain female behaviors towards other women.These behaviors start as early as grammar school when girls were girls.

  15. teretani April 20, 2011 at 10:45 am - Reply

    is it weird? i get along best with gay men. second best with straight or bi men. third with women – all kinds. (i don’t have a lot of lesbian friends). but now that i am married, it doesn’t seem too proper to hang out with straight men or with lesbian women. i guess i should be good friends with more girlfriends and gayfriends. straight guys and lesbian women (at times) seem only want to get under your pants.

  16. Monex May 11, 2011 at 2:27 am - Reply

    I find that I interact better with men than women.Some women not all women are catty chatty dolls. This content of this hub is relevant to the topic and is not intended tobe judgmental offensive or to raise any red flags.This hub was written about my personal encounter and experiences that I have witness and other females have expressed the same view point when it comes to certain female behaviors towards other women.These behaviors start as early as grammar school when girls were girls.

  17. Jim Sheds July 20, 2011 at 11:55 pm - Reply

    I super agree with you! If men don’t like you and women don’t like you then it is obvious that there is a problem here and the common denominator is you! Very well said! I never had a problem to get along with other women either old friend or new meet friends. I believe it’s up to you if how you handle other women around you. But it is much better if you will be friendly and prevent being plastic or else they will surely hate you! In addition, the best thing you have to prevent, just like what you said, don’t look lustfully at another woman’s man! Ha-ha! But for me, I should prevent looking lustfully with another man’s women.
    Jim Sheds recently posted..Tips Towards Locating the Optimal Site Intended for Your ShedMy Profile

  18. Hera September 2, 2011 at 12:13 pm - Reply

    I don’t really have a lot of friends, but at least I have true friends. I think, one very important thing needed to have friends is to be yourself. If people make friends with you because of who you are, that would be awesome. But also, we try to be good so we can be the best person we can be.
    Hera recently posted..play big truck gamesMy Profile

  19. Rin See September 11, 2011 at 12:55 am - Reply

    Your right about the “Black Girl Neck Wiggling Thing” . It looks threatening and it really give me a bad impression.
    Rin See recently posted..Winning LotteryMy Profile

  20. Tina September 13, 2011 at 6:43 pm - Reply

    I am so glad you took interest in giving advice about Female to Female relationships. So important. If you know females that hate you, still be noble and civil. There are nasty females that have encountered bad female relational experiences. Back up and learn to nurture those responses. If you have time to see if your male relationships work out (a year maybe). Give your female relationships just as much effort and time.

  21. Talisha September 13, 2011 at 6:45 pm - Reply

    Time always win dont be Hasty!!!! Nurture other women they are the symbol for your emotional growth!

  22. nayumigrante September 14, 2011 at 10:15 am - Reply

    This is great! I will definitely share this to my boy cousin.. He wants me to help him gain female friend.. And your blog is the right help for him.. Thanks for the share! I really want to help him..
    nayumigrante recently posted..How to Track the Location of an iPhoneMy Profile

  23. Sally Thompson September 20, 2011 at 6:45 am - Reply

    You sure know how to handle friends.. I really hope we could meet in person..
    Sally Thompson recently posted..speedee oil change couponsMy Profile

  24. absol September 27, 2011 at 4:16 am - Reply

    I find that I interact better with men than women.Some women not all women are catty chatty dolls. This content of this hub is relevant to the topic and is not intended Tobe judgmental offensive or to raise any red flags.. | :P
    absol recently posted..mario gamesMy Profile

  25. Mariana October 5, 2011 at 12:56 pm - Reply

    I think, one very important thing needed to have friends is to be yourself.
    Mariana recently posted..angry birds for handyMy Profile

    • Estava Morioka October 6, 2011 at 12:05 am - Reply

      Great point. you are 100% right. Thanks for commenting…

  26. starwars0506 October 5, 2011 at 9:58 pm - Reply

    Very nice tips for what I get along with another women..Thanks for sharing. GREAT! | :P
    starwars0506 recently posted..monster truck games for boysMy Profile

  27. Anna October 6, 2011 at 11:41 pm - Reply

    This was a little bit of a bitchy article. I understand how the turnoffs you listed would prevent you from wanting to become friends with this particular woman, but your opening argument stating that there is something wring with you if only 50% of the population would be considered compatible in terms of friendship. 50% doesn’t sound unreasonable at all in terms of genuine friendship. I was in search of an informative article to discuss why some women find friendship with men easier than with women. I personally grew up with two brothers and a neighborhood full of boys and work in an extremely male dominated field. Everything about the way I was raised and the career path I have chosen as well as my hobbies and interests make men on average more likely compatible friends. That doesn’t mean there is something wrong with me, and screw you for implying such a ridiculous thing. A better article might have included what makes friendships accessible and compatible. This article did nothing but insult a woman you did not like and many you don’t even know. Obviously I won’t get any good information from a dumb ass like you. Think before you write if you are capable.

  28. ashley October 9, 2011 at 8:59 pm - Reply

    Thanks for sharing this great article.I have a freind but he doesnt have a girl freind.I think this might be good for him..Keep up the good work!
    ashley recently posted..The Glass Blowing Art in Murano Shines on Home Decor AccessoriesMy Profile

  29. Carrisa Schaffer October 13, 2011 at 8:59 am - Reply

    This is great ideas, and they are really true.. Thank you for sharing this great article.
    Carrisa Schaffer recently posted..Singing Lesson At HomeMy Profile

  30. Patricia October 15, 2011 at 8:36 am - Reply

    . I believe it’s up to you if how you handle other women around you. But it is much better if you will be friendly and prevent being plastic or else they will surely hate you! In addition, the best thing you have to prevent, just like what you said, don’t look lustfully at another woman’s man! Ha-ha! But for me, I should prevent looking lustfully with another man’s women.
    Patricia recently posted..- Free Dating Sites for MenMy Profile

  31. Valdez October 19, 2011 at 6:57 am - Reply

    I never had a problem to get along with other women either old friend or new meet friends. I believe it’s up to you if how you handle other women around you
    Valdez recently posted..angry birds plushMy Profile

  32. Marianna October 28, 2011 at 5:47 pm - Reply

    “one hot topic was Shayna and how negative she was” so, basically you use other people’s “flaws” as fuel for your fire? There’s not many people I can name who dislike me, except for the ones who have screwed me over for money. But there are a lot who I can’t stand because all they do is trash whoever they can in order to get Brownie points, I guess they have nothing else to talk about…

  33. Luckygirl November 4, 2011 at 7:07 am - Reply

    I personally grew up with two brothers and a neighborhood full of boys and work in an extremely male dominated field. Everything about the way I was raised and the career path I have chosen as well as my hobbies and interests make men on average more likely compatible friends.
    Luckygirl recently posted..Kissing Games OnlineMy Profile

  34. hunterX0506 November 7, 2011 at 10:47 am - Reply

    I was in search of an informative article to discuss why some women find friendship with men easier than with women. I personally grew up with two brothers and a neighborhood full of boys and work in an extremely male dominated field. | :P
    hunterX0506 recently posted..cool truck gamesMy Profile

  35. designer prom gowns November 8, 2011 at 4:12 am - Reply

    To get along to your friends specially girls your tips are very helpful, because sometimes I have a problem getting along with other women.
    designer prom gowns recently posted..Allure Bridal 8766My Profile

  36. Ayah marie November 12, 2011 at 11:43 pm - Reply

    Very well said, Many guys are refreshingly upfront with their anger or frustration, but they can also let things slide much easier, and I can be really blunt and honest, so a lot of the times it’s more about a good personality fit. thanks for sharing..
    Ayah marie recently posted..San Francisco Weather ReportMy Profile

  37. Vivian November 15, 2011 at 10:22 pm - Reply

    I definitely agree with you. You should always keep company with people who complement your personality. But keep in mind that there are some women out there with personalities similar to yours, although they may be few and far between.
    Vivian recently posted..angry birds adviceMy Profile

  38. desperadas December 10, 2011 at 9:31 am - Reply

    This article was so right. Most of women hates women because of the lustful looking to other woman’s man. Women should act appropriately forever. I mean, we, women should be respected and taken care of. To be respected, we should know how to respect other women as well..advice on dating
    desperadas recently posted..advice on dating for menMy Profile

Leave A Response »

CommentLuv badge